Day 7

It's already day 7. I didn't do anything worth doing, except for my work. But I took it with a smile on my face. If I'm going to be doing this all day, I might as well enjoy it then. Which I'm proud to say I did.

2IC came back from his USA training, and OC was around in the office for the whole day. Arrows kept flying in my direction and my upperstudy was no where in sight. Bah.

Well I just kept doing and doing work. Until the pile eventually receded. By then it was 5.30pm. Didn't manage to gym nor run. And by the time I got home, I was too tired to do anything.

Spent time with my parents while they had dinner at drive 6, sharing stories about the day.

I guess you don't have to set out to do something that makes you happy on purpose. But if you do your day to day stuff happily,  doesn't that count as doing something that makes you happy? Instead of brooding over the pile of work, and rather doing it happily,  I think time flew by pretty quick!

Janet is sick in krabi though. Feels helpless that I'm unable to help, but I'm sure she's in good hands :) Take care uh!

Also krabi looks like a postcard. Teleport me there please. Feels so carefree. Looking at the photo makes me want to smile.

An open letter

You know who you are

You've caused me so much pain, joy, heartache, happiness, grief, laughter, tears. You were so much and more. Yet things turned out this way.

No doubt I've gotten over you. But the lack of your presence has left a gaping hole in my heart. Because of you, I've spaced myself away from the things I liked to do, and the people I cared so much about. Because of you, I pretended to be someone I wasn't. Yet you never cared. Or at least, that was how people perceived you to be. I never heeded those warnings that I would get hurt in the end. I've always thought that it would be worth it if it meant I could be with you. I thought I could withstand the pain. I couldn't. Well you moved on with your life with success. Look at me, where am I now. Well it could be worse haha.

The past few days were great. Ever since I started that 100 days thing, I feel lighter, fresh, happier. The hole isn't filled. The concrete needs to be prepared, mixed, poured and settled, then it could be counted as filled. I'd say I'm in the prepping stage.

As I'm typing this, no longer am I in tears, nor feeling sad. Actually I'm smiling. Not sure why, but I am. I think things are looking great for me. I have an idea where I want to be, and I know what I have to do to get there.

It's been a learning experience, so to speak. Though I don't know if I can trust my heart to love someone like I did with you. Maybe not just yet. I don't know if I can take the rejection again. I've given up so much to be near you. But to think of it, it isn't really a lot isn't it? Maybe I was just being weak. Comparatively, I've seen Janet give up so much for Jiale. She went through so much and she survived it. I guess that was the inspiration for me to push through. She's such a strong individual, but if she did it, so can I.

With that I bid you farewell. Thank you for crossing paths with me, and for being a part of my life.


Dex.

Day 6

REST DAY.

As the header says. Today is rest day. Basically didn't do anything.

Went to work, OC left in an hour, then basically slacked in office till lunch. With the exception of dozing off on the table. Went up to bunk to sleep after lunch. KO'ed until 5pm. Time to go home. Decided to give myself a rest day, been running and exercising for the past few days. Felt good, but nothing beats a well deserved rest.

So I guess I'll spend tonight updating and refurbishing this blog. Needs a new makeover huh?

Thinking about it, does anyone still blog anymore?

Continuity.

Hi there.

It has been a while. Too long in fact.

FLASH UPDATE:

I've been feeling down for quite a while lately, and I never knew that a void existed in my mind until recently. A void created when I created gaps among my friends, and the people I care about. I stopped doing the things that I loved to do. I felt fake.

So I started a campaign for myself, "100 days and farther". Basically an online log where I post the common #100happydays stuff. It's makes me do things that make me happy, and spend time with the people I treasure and care about.

While it was working for the first few days, it rekindled my love for blogging. And I decided to restart this blog. But there wasn't a point in running two blogs that basically shared the same thing.

This blog will now have the #100days tag when I post about it, and normal day to day stuff and rants (when available haha).

I don't know. I just feel more attached to this blog somehow.

Hey, I see you having some trouble. Just so you know, I'm here. I would contact you and calm you down or something, if I could though. Anyways. If you see this, contact me. You need someone to talk to. Pronto.

hmmm so apparently you changed your number, and its not like you didn't inform anyone. hmmmmmmm.

FICKEN DAS SCHEIßE

fuck that shit. new year? please. mourn the death of a year instead.

lonely new year. how awesome can that be. 2010 started with a bang, ended up in mellowness.

only thing i can hope now is for this year to just get better.